So this morning at approximately 8:20am I pulled into a parking lot ready to begin my first day of many to come at my new job. I took a deep breath, walked up to the door, pulled, pulled again...it was locked!!! I looked around to make sure no one saw me looking like an idiot trying to open a locked door and walked back to my car and hopped in. It was then 8:27am and someone pulled up and opened the door, I waited about one minute, took a deep breath and walked in the office. There was no one in sight...I poked my head around a couple corners, but still...no one. So I stood there for almost 1 full minute until someone came to the front. That was a strange start to my interesting first day.
I shortly found out that the person who will train me in was not there, so I spent my day creating this new blog and surfing the web. Thank goodness tomorrow is a new day.
On a deeper level...I was feeling a little weird today. Just the fact that I was working at a strange place, with new people it started go get overwhelming. It made me think about why I was at a new job, and then I got sad. I think that I can do a pretty good job for being normal on the outside, but on the inside to let you all know...I am screaming and crying still, telling God how it isn't fair that I don't have a baby and that I don't feel myself. I feel like my life has no purpose now...I was supposed to have a baby, and be a mom...now I am sitting behind a desk...again. Thankfully I can pray...and pray...that is where I find my comfort for now.
My Family
